I know I've been doing these a lot lately, but I've had a lot on my mind, and not to think too highly of myself, but I think you guys need to hear this.
I really don't understand "haters". I just don't. What is the purpose of you tearing something down? Are you trying to change people's mind? Does it just make you feel good to be so negative?
Well, let me tell you something: you're probably NOT going to change someone's mind if you're a b!tch about it. They will see your anger and not want to associate with it. Besides, who are you to tell them that what they love is wrong? It doesn't matter if it's as inconsequential as a fictional character, a book, a tv show, a movie. It doesn't matter if it's important like a boyfriend/girlfriend, president, job. Negative is NOT the way to go.
I'm sick of all the people who rail and rage against Twilight. I get it. You think Stephenie Meyer sucks and Edward's stupid and Bella is a brat. Good for you. Nobody is making you read it. Nobody's making you watch the movies. Sorry for all the media attention, but that's not going somewhere. It's just slightly newsworthy for someone to write 5 novels and they all end up on best-seller lists with movie deals. I don't like Lindsay Lohan, but I don't freak out every time I see her on a magazine cover. Other things I don't like: mushrooms, President Obama, Tiger Woods, the Gosselin family, Alyson Noel's Immortals series, Ellen Schreiber's Vampire Kisses, Kristen Stewart (yes, I'm a Twilight fan who doesn't like KStew), George Lopez's talk show, Desperate Housewives, the Real Housewives, Teen Mom/16 and Pregnant, etc.
Yes, I don't like these things, but I don't actively seek out people who do like them and start fights. I don't post a bunch of anti-[insert something here] all over the place. I don't antagonize people. Instead, I talk about things I DO like because I'd rather do that than spend my life obsessing over something I don't like. To all you "haters" (ugh, I *hate* that term :P), you're not so different from die-hard fans: you're still obsessing over it. You're not hurting it at all. Your negative attention is exactly like the positive attention. Just let it go.
Story time: When the tv show Greek first came on the air a few years ago, I thought it was stupid. I dislike the Greek system at most universities because it perpetuates hazing, stereotypes, and exclusivity. I thought the show would be similar so I never watched it. About 6 weeks ago, when flipping through channels, I caught about 5 minutes of Greek--and I was intrigued. As a result, every day for the past few weeks I have watched at least one episode a day--and I watched the finale yesterday. I'm crushed because it's over and I found I really enjoyed it. Maybe if I'd given it a chance, Greek would still be around (probably not, but I'm thinking hypothetically). This is the other side to hating something: I didn't walk around disparaging Greek, but because I'd never tried it, I had no idea that I was missing out on something good. I completely regret not trying it sooner. It's a relatively small regret, but one I have now.
Story #2: I had a boyfriend a couple years ago (at the height of my Twilight obsession which has now settled down to a solid like as I have found other things to be obsessed over) named Will. Will and I didn't have very much in common hobby-wise, but I tried all the things he liked to do and found some of them were pretty cool. Conversely, Will never did anything I liked. He never tried anything new. Instead, he often nitpicked at Twilight (despite having never read it), and often, he hurt my feelings about it because he was picking at something that meant so much to me that it felt like he was picking on ME. I was too overly sensitive, but that didn't make what he was doing right. I can handle little jokes and regular teasing, but he was downright cruel. Will's best friend Brian, however, would always ask me about Twilight-esque questions. He didn't want to make a snap judgment about something he didn't know about. Yes, he would tease me when I answered his questions, but it didn't feel like he was making fun of me, and he was actually interested by some of the other things I told him. Because of this, Brian and I became really good friends. He often works as a security cop for a movie theater and frequently gets me free tickets to see things. I saw both New Moon and Eclipse at 3 am opening night with him, leading to extremely sleepy but fun nights. I even lent him the books, which he read good-naturedly--but then told me he they really weren't his cup of tea (but he'll still watch the movies with me). Obviously, Will and I are no longer together and rarely speak, even though he and Brian are now roommates. I'm not saying his hate of Twilight caused the breakup, nor was it the cause of my friendship with Brian, but it was a factor in both. How could I be with someone who was so unwilling to try something I really enjoyed?
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that you should be open-minded. Try new things. If it doesn't work out, find, but you don't have to be a b!tch to everybody that likes it. Agree to disagree. And then, forget it. If someone asks you if you've ever watched/read/tried/listened to/etc whatever it is, give an honest opinion, but don't go off on a spiel about how it made you want to vomit/rip your eyes out/poke a pencil in your ears/etc. You'll only seem bitter. Let it go. Embrace the positive. Trust me, it'll make you happier, and you'll feel so much better recommending things you like than tearing down something you don't.
Stay positive, Polyvore, and remember to keep it classy!
Especially you, San Diego!
